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Tuesday, August 29, 2006

He loves me, he loves me not--the art of the playlist

I have been a huge believer in the art of the mix tape mix CD playlist since forever. Since about seventh grade, to be exact, when I stopped listening to Power 96 (booty bass) and the Beach Boys -- an odd combination, to be sure, but I was an odd kid -- and started listening to Zeta "The Best New Rock" 94.9 and Big 106 classic rock. I consider my switch from the popular music at Southwood Middle School and from my mother's music to be my first baby steps toward my own tastes and opinions.

I remember listening to those radio stations almost constantly, ready with my double-cassette-and-CD-player stereo -- always loaded with at least one blank tape -- to capture my new musical sensibilities. My favorite mix tape in seventh grade wasn't a High Fidelity-style mix tape in the sense that it was carefully planned out, but it contained my new favorite songs -- "Stay" by U2, "Sweet Child O' Mine" by Guns N Roses, "Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd, "Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard" by Simon & Garfunkel (ok that one was my mother's influence). Hmmm. Looking at those song titles now, it occurs to me that that was a strange mix, held together only by the tenuous bond of being well-loved (by me. Not necessarily by anyone else).

Anyway, this post does have some relevance to my present life; I'm not meandering down memory lane just for the hell of it. I've alluded to there being a new boy in my life, and I'm at the stage where, when he and I are together, I definitely feel confident that he's as into me as I am into him, but as soon as he leaves I start to freak out. Add to that my ability to question the hell out of everything, and the fact that he didn't call me last night (even though there are certainly no rules saying that we have to talk on the phone all the time) and what you have is a great big ball of neurotic.

I have emailed my friends, freaking out a little bit, but because I don't want to burn any bridges and therefore have no one to freak out to later on drive them nuts, I decided to self-medicate.

No, not by drinking or picking up a coke habit, but by gathering together all of my hopeful and all of my no-way-in-hell songs into a playlist that I like to call He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not. In a way, I mourn the passing of the mix tape and the slow decline of the mix CD, but all I've got is my iPod and iTunes, so there you go. The playlist is a work in progress cause even though I came up with the brilliant idea yesterday at work, I found a million other things to distract me before I finally started working on it at 10 last night, including but not limited to a nap a walk dinner Weeds Scrubs downloading knitting reading visiting a bereaved friend talking on the phone and emailing damn I have no focus whatsoever, and this is what I've got so far:

You Will, You Will by Bright Eyes
Crazy Little Thing Called Love by Queen
With Arms Outstretched by Rilo Kiley
Be Still My Heart by Death Cab for Cutie
Fair by Remy Zero
Love Buzz by Nirvana
Rest of my Life by Rilo Kiley
Muddy Hymnal by Iron & Wine
Take a Look at me Now by The Postal Service
Don't Speak by No Doubt
Love Fool by The Cardigans

What I'm trying for here, what I hope to eventually achieve, is a musical representation of the stages of a new romance--the fear, the excitement, the uncertainty, the disbelief, the possibility that it will end in disaster, the hope that it won't, all of it. I'm not what I like to call a puppy dogs fluffy clouds and rainbows kind of girl, so you're not going to see any "I Will Always Love You" or similar on my iPod -- and while we're on the subject: Aundra, I had to get rid of Danity Kane, Rihanna, and the Pussycat Dolls cause the fear of them coming up on "shuffle" was too much for me to bear, but I did keep Paris and Ms. Furtado -- so about the most romantic/optimistic I'm gonna get is "Be Still My Heart." Which, for me, is pretty damn romantic.

I know that this playlist is far from complete, and most of what is on it was already on my iPod, so I'll take any and all suggestions for what else to include. These are the only rules:
*No puppy dogs, fluffy clouds, or rainbows
*Can be either He Loves Me or He Loves Me Not, but cannot be These Boots are Made for Walkin' (best break-up/brokehearted playlist, coming soon)
*No more than two songs by the same artist. This isn't so much for other people, but to keep me from filling it with Death Cab/The Postal Service.

6 Comments:

  • i really like that playlist.

    By Blogger McGeekan, at 1:10 PM  

  • I'm also a big fan of the mixed tape/CD/playlist. I got some tried/true and new ones that I can throw at you. Whatcha think??

    Trouble Me -- 10,000 Maniacs
    You Shook Me All Night Long -- AC/DC
    You're The First, The Last, My Everything -- Barry White
    Moon Faced And Starry Eyed -- Benny Goodman
    Cheek To Cheek -- Billie Holliday
    Just The Way You Are -- Billy Joel
    In The Flesh - Blondie
    I'm So Glad - Cream
    I Don't Believe You Meet My Baby - Dolly Parton
    Is There Something I Should Know -- Duran Duran
    C'est Si Bon (It's So Good) -- Eartha Kitt
    I Got It Bad (And That Ain't Good) -- Ella Fitzgerald
    Ev'ry Time We Say Goodbye -- Ella Fitzgerald
    Save It For Later - The English Beat
    Crazy On You -- Heart
    Get Up (Sex Machine) -- James Brown
    The Fact Is (I Need You) -- Jill Scott
    Lights -- Journey
    Sex Object - Kraftwerk
    Love Me -- Love & Rockets
    Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad? -- Moby
    Bizarre Love Triangle -- New Order
    I Want A Little Sugar In My Bowl - Nina Simone
    In Your Eyes -- Peter Gabriel (too obvious??)
    I Like Love - pop poppins

    By Blogger jacquieblackman, at 8:14 PM  

  • Ah there are always the Billy songs. Blond Over Blue is an other good for you, now that you're blond. That will be it for my suggestions 'cause I am a sap for pop culture. Oh but what I do have that should on that, that might be a little puppy dog and does break a Tasha rule (Disney) but come on... The LIttle Mermaid> Kiss the Girl! Aerosmilth I Don't Wnat to Miss A Thing. Okay last one The ALl American Rejects> My Paper Heart (Yes I am going down my Itunes list and I'm stopping now)

    By Blogger Aundra, at 11:43 PM  

  • Jacquie, thanks for the great suggestions. Begin downloading... now!

    Aundra, you are never allowed near my He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not playlist. I love you to pieces, but no way!

    By Blogger Tasha, at 7:05 AM  

  • why? and Kiss the Girl was mentioned at a joke and 'cause it was the first thing my Itues played.

    By Blogger Aundra, at 10:00 AM  

  • cause of Kiss the Girl. and Don't Want to Miss a Thing, even though i actually like aerosmith.

    By Blogger Tasha, at 10:44 AM  

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