Paste it in the head!


Saturday, March 25, 2006

Lap dances and hockey

Every time I walk down Yonge street to get to the Y (I'm doing an archives project there), I pass a strip club called the Brass Rail. They have an electronic marquee and one day, I noticed that it said, "Very satisfying lap dances." Now, call me crazy, but shouldn't a strip club be advertising things like "Hottest lap dances in town," or "Most flexible girls in Canada"? At least those statements give you something to compare your previous and presumably crappy experiences to--even if you thought you got a good lap dance or saw a flexible stripper, that was nothing compared to what you can get here. But really, "Very satisfying lap dances"? Doesn't that just imply that on the scale of satisfaction, from, say, so unsatisfying that you weren't aroused at all to so satisfying that you had a happy ending, "very" satisfying might lean towards the latter but in no way meets it?

Last night, Alli invited a group of us to watch her brother play hockey. He plays for St. Mike's, and the connection between St. Mike's, the OHL, and the University of Toronto is pretty hazy to me so I won't even try to explain it. Anyway, I'd never been to a hockey game before. We had pretty good seats--fourth row from the rink. The game was really good, very fast and exciting, and holy shit, hockey is so violent! I mean, I knew it was, having watched it on tv, but I really had no idea. At one point, two players got into a fight and started punching each other, and the refs just stood there watching. Are you fucking kidding? I might not be a sports fanatic but I've been to a few games, mostly football and basketball, and if the players started punching each other at a football game, the refs would be on them in two seconds and they would be kicked out. And theoretically I'm opposed to fighting and violence, but I have to say it was pretty exciting to watch those guys fight. And when they body check each other (or whatever it's called, when they slam each other into the sides of the rink), it's so loud! But seriously it was so cool and I had so much fun. I even got a free shirt for yelling really loud and the girl giving away the shirts was totally looking at me when she threw it, but Jarrod intercepted it and then I think Alli made him give it to me anyway. Somehow both he and I ended up with a shirt. Awesome. And then Lorien and I went home and knitted. I'll post pictures later.


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